WW 2012: Week 11

How fast time is slipping by...finishing the 11th week of the New Year and week 2 of my WW re-boot. This week was tough, my weekend away was a struggle to stay on track and eat healthy. More planning will have to be done before I do it again for Spring Break. I have also been sick all week with sinus and allergies issues which makes me want to sleep and not take care of myself. I managed to pull of an 8 ounce loss...just over a 1/2 lb which I am not going to be unhappy about.

Overall, I made better choices and watched my portions. There was one day I was really craving chocolate and instead of buying the whole bag of Hershey Eggs I picked up a Twix and gave my daughter the other cookie in it so it was half the points. I could have had the whole thing and still been good with my PP but just that one cookie filled my need and I was good after that and of course, she was pleased as punch. lol

I still need to put my focus in meal and snack planning so I am not caught off guard when in a time crunch with the kids. Down a total of 3.6lbs for my challenge...41/2 to go for my minimum in the challenge.

Six Week Challenge

Here I am again...re-booting. Why is this so hard for me? Atkins was a major fail..what the hell was I thinking? lol So, here I am starting week 2 of WW's Points Plus and I am feeling better. Life is hard right now for me..so hard to be separated from my husband and only seeing him one night a week or every two weeks. Overwhelmed with kids and trying to figure out how the hell I am going to clean this house out and pack it up and walk away from 12 yrs of raising a family here. Its depressing but I can do this. We are starting over and its happening faster than I thought it would.

So, week one is done. I did pretty good..stayed pretty close to my target. I had a loss of 2.8 lbs which is pretty good. I am setting a challenge for myself which is to stay fully committed for 6 weeks. So..5 weeks to go and I will reset a goal on April 13th. In this 6 weeks, I have set the goal to lose 8-10 lbs...6 more pounds I will have hit that goal. I will be celebrating with my Spring Mani/Pedi! lol

I am also going to do something visual for every pound lost..just not sure what yet. I am thinking a charm bracelet with every 10 lbs having a large charm and the smaller ones a bead. Right now, I am looking for ideas. I want something I can wear and add to it and have that constant visual that I am working on this goal.

I don't want to depress anyone who might visit and groan.."oh boy..here she is again restarting herself. How many times is she going to do this?" Well, the answer is simple. As MANY TIMES as I need to in order to have it stick! If it depresses you..I am sorry. You don't have to keep me on your blog roll...with the lack of comments I probably wouldn't even know. lol I love those who have supported me all along and thanks so much for not deleting me off your blog roll. I promise I am not helpless or hopeless just struggling with life and trying to get myself refocused.

So...I am off for a weekend with the kids and husband out of town. Staying in the house we will be moving into and I need to pack groceries and some dishes so I can cook. Ready to get away from the stresses and just enjoy my Mom and family. See ya next week!

The Fight from Within..

Friday and Saturday were just insanely busy and distracting from my focus on myself. Lesson learned.

PLAN AHEAD

PLAN AHEAD

PLAN AHEAD

 I know this and yet, I found myself Friday night and Saturday too low on my carbs and having that urge to binge. Its a knee jerk reaction and I know this but I didn't put myself first because I let myself to be rushed about as a Mom Taxi.

Friday, I had the time to plan and pack a snack before picking up the kiddos from school...I even thought about running into the house to slice up the extra chicken breast I had and grab some cheese so I wouldn't be starved as I waited for the eldest to get done with his tutoring session. Instead I felt the rush to get on the road..I don't have time for me. I got home early evening way past dinner and I could feel my body reacting badly to being ravenous. I took the kids through McD's for their dinner and I ordered a plain hamburger with mustard and of course, they couldn't get that right and I found down the road that I was given a cheeseburger. I was so hungry I thought about just eating it but instead gave it to the oldest. I got home and fixed a good dinner for myself and felt better but I could have avoided it all had I not been lazy and just took care of myself when I had the time earlier in the day.

Saturday the same thing happened...I had only time to make coffee as I rushed out the door to take my oldest to his first Solo and Ensemble. I didn't get home until nearly 12pm and instead of taking the time to fix a meal for me I packed the other kids up and we went grocery shopping. So many temptations and so many fleeting moments of thought that had me thinking of throwing my whole week out the window to fill that need for immediate satisfaction. I ended up getting beef  and cheese sticks instead and then fixing a good dinner. This is not how to do Atkins and I know better. Its so important to get the right balance of fat, protein and vegetable based carbs.

So many times I had thoughts of falling off the wagon for just one day but I kept remembering if I do that I could ruin the progress I have made and it will spur so many more bad cravings. Keeping my focus on what i want to achieve which is a healthier and thinner me who can feel good about herself. I have a kid graduating in May I don't want to be that Mom who you don't see in the celebration photos.

So..I am proud that I hung on and didn't cave and I realize more how important it is to take care of my needs first. My kids are old enough to take care of themselves and I am not selfish by doing it. Below is my accountability and I know that yesterday was just atrocious and is not the way to eat on any plan.

2-11-12
Carbs: 10.6
H2O-64 oz

Breakfast: .4
Soft boiled egg-.2
Coffee, splenda and whipping cream-2

Lunch: 2.2
Beef Sticks-2
2 Cheese sticks-2

Dinner: 8
Burger-0
Mayo n Dijon-1
1 cup sliced Cucumber-2
1 roma tomato sliced-4.3
1/4 sm onion-1.5
Red Wine Vinegar-0

2-10-12 (238.6lbs)
Carbs: 13
H2O: 48 oz

Breakfast: 3
3 eggs scrambled-.6
2 oz cheddar-1
1 tsp sour cream-,5
2 tsp Pico-1

Snack: .2
Hard boiled egg

Lunch: 3.5
Chicken Breast diced-0
Mayo-1
Dijon-0
1 cup salad-.4
1/2 red pepper-2.3

Dinner: 6.4
Chicken Breast-0
1 cup salad-.4
Bleu Cheese-2
1/2 red pepper-2.3
3 oz cheddar-1.5
Egg-.2

Day 4 Review

Many things to celebrate as I go into my 5th day on Atkins...

I am down 3.4 lbs

Soda Free 5 days

No cravings

More energy

Migraine is pretty much gone

and....

Its been a test for me to stay grounded with my husband home for his days off, he cooked dinner last night and some rice made it onto plate. "He forgot and thought I could have rice on Atkins" ... but that was okay. Just took it off and I didn't miss it. lol

Busy day today with an errand to run and then pick up 3 of the kids from school. I need to run my oldest to a Trombone lesson at Western Michigan University. The professor who runs the Trombone studio for the Music program has graciously offered a few free lessons to our son to work on a few minor things as he waits to find out if he will be accepted by this professor into the studio for the upcoming school year. Without a studio he won't get into the Music program of his choice...his dream is to teach music. We are in a winter weather advisory this afternoon which makes driving anxiety filled for me. lol Fingers are crossed that it won't be as bad as predicted.

Stepped on the scale this morning and its moving in the right direction..I am averaging a lb or so a day. Totally happy with that! I am also 5 days into being Soda Free and not missing or having cravings.

I can do this!!

Below is my food journal from yesterday...

2-9.-12
Carbs: 14.6
H2O: 48oz

Breakfast: 5.7
3 eggs scrambled-,6
1 oz cheese-1
1/4 red pepper-1.6
sour cream-.5
coffee, splenda and 2 tbls whipping-2

Lunch: 6.3
Burger-0
1 roma-4.3
onion-1
red wine vinegar-0
parmesan-0
mayo-1
mustard-0

Snack: .2
1 hardboiled egg

Dinner- 2.4
Grilled Steak-0
6 grilled Asparagus-2.4

Day 3 Review

The week is moving along quite nicely! Starting Day 4 and I am starting to feel I am in a routine now. I crashed early last night and of course, you know the saying "Early to bed, early to rise!" That was me. I fell asleep while watching Soul Surfer with my daughter at 8pm and awoke with my bladder at 4am. Tossed and turned, stalked Facebook and annoyed my husband by waking him so he could turn his body over. Who can fall back to sleep when you have someone snoring in your ear?? That is the time of day that I fantasize about him but not in the way he wishes. lol Its more like what would happen if I stuffed his mouth with a sock fantasy. lol

I finally got up and made my morning coffee and awoke the kids for school. I actually have some pep in my step today. I started a load of laundry, had my breakfast and working on the kitchen little by little. I have had intense back pain because I have gone several months with out my back injections due to finances and loss of health insurance but I feel like today I can push through the pain but mindful not to overdue. I can't wait to see my Pain Clinic Dr. in April!

So here is my Day 3 in review..Happy Thursday!

2-8-12

Carbs: 15.5

H2O: 40 oz

Breakfast: 6.6

3 eggs- .6

2 oz Cheddar-2

1tbs Sour cream-.5

1/4 Pico-1.5

Coffee, 1 splenda and 2 tbs whipping crm-2

Lunch: 2

1 diced chicken breast-0

1 tbs mayo-1

1 tsp Dijon-0

1 celery Stalk-.8

1 hard boiled egg- .2

Dinner: 6.9

Grilled Salmon-0

1 1/2 cups salad-.6

1/2 red pepper-2.3

Bleu Cheese-2

Bleu Cheese dressing-2

Temptations and Day 2

When it comes to temptations it doesn't take much for me to be derailed. It doesn't even need to be an emotional trigger. I will be having an awesome day with food and I will see a commercial or my husband will bring something home that I didn't even ask for and I will suddenly WANT IT..and WANT IT NOW! 

Yesterday was one of those awesome days with food but not a good day physically because of a migraine. My husband doesn't live with us anymore with the exception of 1-2 days a week that he comes home to visit. The job he found is an hour and a half away. When he called late afternoon that he was on his way home I asked him to pick up pizza for the kids, an easy dinner for them and then I could focus on just making my own dinner and nursing my migraine. He walked in the door with not only 2 pizzas but double the amount. The kids were over the moon because that means leftovers after school. lol Normally the smell of pizza would be a trigger but because I had eaten I really didn't give it a 2nd thought! Yay me!

What ticked me off was despite talking with my husband how I had started Atkins on Monday and it was going really well...in fact I had told him when he was getting pizza that I wouldn't be eating it because its not Atkins friendly. I don't know if its a matter of selective hearing or just plan ignorance but he tossed me a bag of my favorite candy.

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME???

I was childish and threw them right back at him and asked, "Do you not ever hear what I say to you? Really?" He said he was sorry, that he forgot. Whatever. I refuse to let his coming home a couple of days to screw me up. The reason why I was able to stick to Atkins the first time was because I did have that attitude of taking care of my needs first after the kids basics were taken care of. Well, my kids are all now 10 and up and very well capable of wiping their noses and fixing their food. I am not going to wait for my husband to support me..either he does it or I won't count on him. The last time after I had lost 30lbs he would try to derail me so much and he admitted then he was jealous and worried that once I found my skinny self again that I would leave him. I told him then it wouldn't happen but if he is that insecure to join me and get healthy with me. He did just that and I am praying that he will do it again.

So, Day 2 was a good day. Still learning to get the right balance of veggies so that most of my carbs are plant based. The scale is already down 2.2 lbs which is probably water weight but I don't care..so HAPPY to see it going down again. Even on WW's I couldn't lose like that so it really tells me what my body responds well to doing.

2-7-12

Carbs: 16.4

H20: 48oz

Breakfast: 6.8

Coffee, Splenda (2), 3 tbs Whipping Cream(1)-3

3 eggs scrambled-.8

2 oz cheddar-1

1/4 cup Pico-1.5

1 tbs Sour Cream-.5

Lunch: 5.8

Burger-0

1 roma tomato-4.3

1/4 sm onion-1.5

mayo-0

red wine vinegar=0

parmesan-.5

6 olives-0

Dinner- 1.8

chicken=-0

parmesan-.5

2 cups salad-.8

Ranch-1

3 oz cheddar-3

Snack: 3

Hardboiled Egg-.2

12 Green olives-1 

Day 1 in review

Well, so far so good!
Day 1 is under my belt and looking forward to Day 2. I have decided to give up WW's ..I have been doing it for the last 2 years and its such a struggle because I know I can have whatever I want but I lack the self control when my emotions are crazy.

When I really sit down and think back over the years I realize that the most healthy I have felt and the one WOL (way of life) that worked was Atkins. I had lost over 70 lbs over the course of a year but the reason why I failed was because I didn't do it properly. For those truly not familiar with the concept of Atkins or have misconceptions that its too limiting I am here to say I eat much more healthier than I do on WW's. Think of Atkins as a ladder with many steps (rungs)..the very first level before you can get on the first rung is Induction which is the most limiting phase. You can do this for 14 days or do it extended..after that you move on to the rungs which slowly adds in more veggies, nuts, fruit and eventually other dairy. I will analyze whether to move on to the first rung based on my rate of loss. I am committed to the original Dr. Atkins book from 2002 (DANDR) because the last time I tried to go back to Atkins I failed miserably to lose weight and stick to it because the Atkins website is not the original DANDR.

So each day I will post my meal plan from the day before so that I have extra accountability. I may not be perfect in adding my carbs or getting in the right balance every day but I will strive for it. The results at the scale and in how my clothes fit will be my gauge on how well I am doing. The only drawback from doing Induction is that some people get what feels a bit flu-ish and for me headaches. This is temporary as you are limiting all unnatural sugars and processed foods from your body. Its a detox that once you get through it (for some a week or so) you truly feel fantastic. I have eaten so much junk the last few months that I am looking forward to purging my body from the crap.

2-6-12
Carbs: 17.1
H2O-36 oz

Breakfast: 5.5
Coffee, 2 Splenda, 2 oz Whipping Cream-2
4 Boiled Eggs-2.5
Mayo-0

Lunch: 3.6
Steak-0
1/2 cup Sauteed Mushrooms-1.2
6 spears Asparagus-2.4
butter-0

Dinner-8
Med Burger-0
2 oz sharp cheddar-1
1tbs sour cream-1
1/4 Pico de Gallo-1.5
1 cup Spinach-4.4
Red Wine Vinegar-0
Butter-0